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May 10, 2021 - Quit Drinking Again

Today I am quitting alcohol for good. Looking back at all the years I have wasted my time and money on alcohol. All the time I was belligerent and stupid.  I am done. No more. Not even one.

I hate it. It ruins lives and hurts people. I used it as a coping mechanism for far too long. I don't want to ruin my life any further. I already have far too much to deal with. 

Also, I have to think of how alcohol affects my disease. It's no secret that alcohol decreases brain size over time as well as causes inflammation in the brain which is exactly what you want to avoid.

It also kills your motivation which is another bad thing for people with MS. You really want to excersize daily, eat healthy foods, avoid sugar and processed food/beverages (which alcohol is both), and avoid situations where you could potentially fall and cause injury.

I don't want alcohol to be a constant in my life and I only ever drank to deal with my grief. It was never supposed to go on for this long but I guess alcohol did it's job too well and I avoided dealing with my grief. It's time to face it head on and stop using coping mechanisms because they have wasted 10 years of my life, most of which is now a blur. Sad but true.

It's okay. I'm moving past that now.

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