September 1, 2021 - Tummy Trouble

    So this morning I was able to get out of bed and use the bathroom before the spasm hit. It was a nice change of pace. I am praying that this means things are getting better but if they are it means the muscle spasms were influenced by my menstrual cycle.

    I am glad in the sense that this would mean that I wouldn't have them as often but I am disappointed that I will dread my period even more now. Only time will tell for sure.

    I stopped taking the baclofen. I didn't take it at all yesterday which proves that it wasn't doing anything. 

    I have been working to improve enough to return to work. I miss being independent as well as not having to rest like an 80-year-old. In fact, I think an 80-year-old would have more stamina. 

    Having MS isn't fair. I pray the Tecfidera is working. If not, it would mean my MS is aggressive and that I would need to take some serious measures because I don't want any more relapses. I have been thinking about the HSCT treatment. It poses its own risks but if I am able to live the next 10 years without suffering a serious disability then I am willing to try it. I am just desperate to be free of this. 

    MS is always on my mind now. I don't really get an escape from it. I think about the past, present, and future of this disease and how my life has and will change. I know this will pose its challenges but I am going to do whatever I can to fight it. If not for myself, then for my husband.

    So the soles of my feet feel like they are burning. Is it possible to flush on the bottom of your feet?

    Just had another spasm. When is this going to stop? I'm sick of it. 2 is better than 5. 

    My neck feels loose and achy. I have a little bit of an ear ache in my right ear. My head feels the same way and I'm swimming in vertigo. Vertigo all the time. I feel like I'm in a fish bowl or on an alien ship spinning. If it's not one thing, than it's another. Can't I catch a break? 😐

    Tonight I get to experience the lovely GI upset side effects from the magnificent Tecfidera. I am spending my evening trying my best to not throw up despite the overwhelming amount of saliva production and burning stomach pain. Eating seemed to make it worse which sucks because dinner was actually pretty good. I am so tired. To top things off as I was turning over I was overcome by spasm. So so tired and frustrated. At least the spasms have seemed to quiet down.